Have you ever wondered why are we obsessed with finding a life purpose or choosing a dream career?
There are millions of groups on Facebook on this topic and an equally high number of motivational speakers and coaches teaching us how to live a purposeful life.
It is as if just living, working and creating a family are not enough to validate that we are doing fine, that we are ok!!
Not according to Winston S. Churchill:
“It’s not enough to have lived. We should be determined to live for something.”
―
First Food then Purpose
I believe after having spent 50 years trying to find the ideal spot under the sun, I have figured it all out.
People can talk about fulfilling and purposeful work only when their existential problems are solved.
If there is no money to feed the family, we will accept any job. In contrast, if money is good, we start searching for a higher meaning. Maslow’s study on human needs is a must-read if you want to dive deeper into this topic.
A global poll conducted by Gallup has uncovered that out of the world’s one billion full-time workers, an astronomical 85% are unhappy in their jobs.
I believe that not making a meaningful contribution at work or having the personal values and interests not being aligned with those at work contributes significantly to this global unhappiness.
The biggest complaint of employees in developed societies is a well paid, but unfulfilling job.
A friend of mine in this situation told me she feels locked in a golden cage.
Ultimately, purposeful work that brings good money is what we want. This will make us feel happy, fulfilled and free.
Purpose makes us happy
Purpose, or doing something meaningful makes us happy.
Here is how organisational Psychologist Adam Grant thinks about it. He has noticed that many people are languishing, meaning feeling meh. They are not very unhappy, but they are not really inspired or motivated, just surviving.
Based on his research we can stop languishing if we increase these three elements in our daily routine:
- Mastery: become really good in something and improve a little every day. Small wins make us feel happy!
- Mindfulness: make sure you have uninterrapted blocks of focus during the day. Focus on one thing at a time and don’t be afraid of missing out, if you leave your phone unattended for a couple of hours.
- Matter: Do something meaningful every day. What you do has to matter to someone. We need to feel that we are making a valuable contribution. This is the point I am exploring a bit further bellow.
The good thing he concludes with is that having fun with the people you love contains all the three elements above. So, life is not just about work.
To put it differently, happy life is when work is centred around your qualities and interests and provides you, not only security and wealth but also a sense of purpose.
Finding purpose: Your Contribution
You might have experienced that finding your purpose is not a straightforward task. In fact, it is a process we all go through as we age.
It is the process of getting to know yourself better and developing the courage to change your circumstances and creating the environment you need to flourish and give your best contribution to the world.
There are specific questions that you can ask yourself to shed a light on your purpose.
Watch this video for an explanation of the first question:
What is your contribution to life so far?
Get your journal and write it down!
Conclusion
I want to conclude with a personal note.
There is something very special about reaching the beautiful age of 50. At this age, the purpose comes to you! Yeah, I know I am on the late side 😉
I notice that I know myself better and it benefits me in so many ways. I trust my intuition, I accept my good and less amazing treats, I claim my space. Cause only then I can lead with all the wisdom and experience gained through the years. Only then I can leave a purposeful life and develop the best version of myself.
In summary, having a purpose is a basic human need and the fulfilment of it comes with knowing yourself, with knowing what you are truly capable of.
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>> Click here << for a list of books that recently influenced me profoundly and are today part of my body and mind.